My PS4 is doing exactly the same thing. I updated the software to 3.10 then some time after that the controller just disconnected. Both of my controllers are now unable to be synced to the PS4, both work in safe mode via the physical connection and both will pair without problem to my mac. I called sony about this and they said to try pairing with a foreign controller and see if that fixes the problem. The support person I spoke to on the phone found it very hard to believe it could be related to the update or a problem with the actual bluetooth chip in the PS4.